Me stealing other people's writing, AGAIN

Again, b/c I apparently have noting witty to say, I'll just post funny things I see in the Express. From today's...

Coke with Coffee: Try singing "I'd like to buy the world a carbonated fusion beverage, and keep it company." We're not feeling the world peace. Coca-Cola Blak, which arrives in the United States on April 3, is an unholy (or "premium," as the company likes to say) blend of Coke and coffee. We did not obtain a sample of this abomination, but did run a simulation with office coffee and Diet Coke. Tastes like burning!

Answers from the Shoeblogger: (I feel this was appropriate with my impending wedding)
Question: I am a bridesmaid in my best friend's wedding. What color shoes do I wear with a fuschia tea-length dress? (NOTE: my ladies will NOT be wearing fuschia or tea length dresses.)
Answer: Manolo says, the Manolo has noticed over the past three or four of the years that the dresses of the bridesmaids have grown slightly less hideous. Where before, the bridesmaid could rely upon the poufy/frilly gown designed to minimize the bust and maximize the booty, now the trend it has moved towards bridesmaids who perhaps maybe look OK. Still, the eternal problem it is that the dress must match the fatasy color scheme decided upon by the Bridezilla and her rampaging mob of wedding consultants and hangers-on. (he goes on to actually answer the question but I thought that was the funny part.)